


"I'm Not Going to Hit You"

by Trekkiehood



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abuse, Abusive John Winchester, Angst, Awesome Bobby Singer, Bad Parent John Winchester, Child Abuse, Drinking, Each chapter is stand alone, Emotional Hurt, Gen, Good Parent Bobby Singer, Good Sibling Sam Winchester, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Panic Attack, Pre-Canon, Season/Series 01, Sonny's Home For Boys (Supernatural), Stanford Era (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:21:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28309644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trekkiehood/pseuds/Trekkiehood
Summary: Three times Dean was told, "I'm not going to hit you." Three times the people in Dean's life realize that there might be more going on in Dean's life than the kid is willing to admit.A Christmas Present for my friend PricelessTrashPanda <3
Relationships: Bobby Singer & Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Sonny (Supernatural: Bad Boys) & Dean Winchester
Comments: 8
Kudos: 127





	1. 2001 - Bobby

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pricelesstrashpanda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pricelesstrashpanda/gifts).



> This is an idea that was swimming in my head that I shared with Line. I decided to write it and just make it a Christmas present to her. 
> 
> Love you and hope you enjoy it <3
> 
> I hope everyone else enjoys it too!

In the life of a hunter, things changed, Bobby Singer knew that. The past year had brought drastic changes in the life of the Winchester's which had of course just as drastically affected the life of the hunting mechanic. 

Sam Winchester was at college and John Winchester was who knew where chasing whispers of a chance to avenge his dead wife, but Dean, Dean Winchester was always right there. Dean was the one who didn’t leave. Dean was the one crashing at Bobby’s place because, despite everything, he was still just a confused, scared kid. 

Bobby knew that everything that had ever offered Dean any comfort had been stripped away. Everything except for his old childhood refuge in South Dakota. 

The boy looked rough. His eyes bloodshot, bruises fading on his face, peeking out from around his T-shirt, and darkening his arms. And while Dean had always been able to hold his liquor, Bobby found his new-found tolerance concerning. 

Dean stood up from the kitchen table almost in a daze, one that the boy had been in and out of since he had shown up at the junkyard almost a week ago. He’d switch back into his old self, laughing at Bobby for getting old and making crude jokes, only to clam up again and freeze as if remembering this isn’t just a quick stay with his brother until their dad finished another job. His brother was gone and there was no real certainty that his dad would ever come back. 

Bobby felt for the kid but was unsure of what he could do to help other than give him cars to fix and treat him as if nothing had changed. 

The faraway look in Dean’s eyes magnified as he froze, plate in hand, staring at the empty seat usually reserved for Sam. The plate slipped, causing a loud crash as the plate fractured on the floor.

Dean’s breath hitched and accelerated as he stared at the shattered pieces of glass. “Nonononono, ‘m sorry, ‘m sorry, ‘m sorry.” He began muttering almost in a panic.

Bobby’s eyes widened. Not at the plate, but at the sudden terror Dean was exhibiting. He looked shell-shocked like he couldn’t breathe. The old man shot out of his chair, reaching for the boy who had become like a son to him. “Dean?” 

Dean flinched backwards, nearly falling in his haste to get away. His eyes were blown wide with panic, his arms coming up to cover his face as if expecting to ward off a blow. Bobby stopped, feeling the air leave his lungs as he listened to Dean’s short, frantic breathes in between his clipped and ragged apologies. 

The pieces clicked into place and Bobby felt unadulterated rage well up inside of him. He’d assumed the bruises and large handprint sized marks on Dean’s body were from nothing more than the life of a hunter. A hunter who was used to having back up and was now a lone hunter. But this, this reaction sent coils of hot anger down into the very essence of Bobby Singer. In that moment Bobby hated John Winchester. Hated him more than he even hated himself and that was an extremely rare occurrence. 

“Dean.” He snapped, short, clipped, and more forceful than he had meant.

Dean stopped the muttering, flinching hard before bringing his arms back down from his defensive position. He still looked pale and afraid but seemed to be more in control of himself. More like the twenty-two-year-old he was and less like a scared twelve year old. 

“Dean,” He said again, this time softer, “I need you to listen to me and listen to me good. I will never hit you, do you understand me?” 

Dean looked dumbfounded, his hands now at his side clenching awkwardly. 

“I-I know that Bobby.” He said quietly. “It’s just…” he trailed off, bringing a hand up to rub over his face, “It’s just been a rough couple of months.”

“I’m serious Dean. I would never intentionally hurt you and I need you to understand that.”

“I DO Bobby, I promise. I know you won't ever hurt me.” He offered one of his trademark grins, trying to lighten the mood. “You couldn’t hurt this pretty face if you tried.”

Bobby didn’t laugh. He found nothing about this situation humorous. He still felt ready to slug John as soon as he has the misfortune of showing his face. “Dean, if…” He cut himself off, feeling drained. “Does your daddy-?”

“Don’t. Don’t Bobby.” The smile dropped from Dean’s face and his voice became dark and deadly serious. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to.” 

Bobby gritted his teeth, the already boiling anger about ready to spill over. It was just as much an answer as a straightforward ‘yes’ would have been. “Maybe it’s best that he don’t come back.” He muttered under his breath. He meant it to. He should have known Dean would hear him and would never agree with him.

The boy looked terrified, eyes widening in blind fear, “No, no Bobby! No! He’ll come back. He will.” The old man wished Dean had said it in fear of the man’s return, and not as if it was a prayed matra, wishing him back. “And it’s gonna be fine. He jus- just misses Sam and isn’t sure exactly what to do with himself yet. He has to come back, Bobby.” 

And Bobby felt a little guilty at forcing such a rise out of Dean but he didn’t take what he said back. “Dean-”

“I’m fine Bobby. Really. If I wasn’t I do something about it. I’m not an idiot. I can take care of myself. I know you would never hit me, Bobby. I just freaked out for a second, okay?” His eyes were begging for him to understand. 

Bobby took a deep breath, “Okay, Okay, I’ll drop it. But you have to promise that if it ever get’s too bad you’ll get out. Come here. Find your brother in California. Go off on your own. I don’t care, but just promise me you won’t let him go to far.”

“I promise Bobby, It’s not like that. I’ll get out if I need to. I swear.” The panic was still there, tinting every word. 

“Okay.” Bobby said trying to force himself to be calm and hoping it would soothe the younger hunter. “Okay.”

Dean nodded, “I’ll, uh, I’ll clean up the glass now.” He said almost awkwardly. 

“You do that.” Bobby answered, ignoring his own unfinished plate of food and walking out of the room, trying to let his anger go.

He did let it go until a drunk John Winchester showed up and took a swing at Dean. Bobby chased him off his property with a cocked shotgun. He regretted the action only because it was over three years before he saw Dean again, standing on his front porch asking for help to find his daddy. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonny gets a call from Dean's school. Dean freaks out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next part as promised. 
> 
> Shorter, but to be fair, I haven't actually watched the full episode yet... Just clips. 
> 
> Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

“Yes, yes thank you for calling. No, no I know. He’ll turn it in tomorrow. Thank his teacher for the extension. Yeah. Thanks again, Larry.”

Sonny hung up the phone with a sigh. All things considered, Dean had been doing well in school. For probably the first time in his life, the kid was doing more than just passing. Larry, the school principal, only called because he was concerned. Dean hadn’t turned in his big project. Sonny knew for a fact that Dean had been working on it, what would compel him to not turn it in was beyond him.

The front door opened and he heard Dean laughing at something before shouting a goodbye at someone. The door slammed shut and hurried footsteps.

“Heya, Sonny.” Dean said, freezing when he saw the look on the older man’s face. “What?” He asked with a nervous smile. “Did I forget to shut the freezer door or somethin’?”

“The school called.” Was all Sonny said before Dean completely blanched.

“Why? I didn’t get into a fight, I swear Sonny it wasn’t me.” The kid looked terrified, eyes wide.

“They said you didn’t turn in your English paper.” He said, arms crossed, “Do you know anything about that?”

“I did it Sonny. I did, I swear. I just forgot about it. Why would they call about that? I’m still passing the class and she said I could just turn it in tomorrow!”

“They were worried something was wrong. You’ve been doing well and they didn’t want you to ruin it now.” They had also been checking to make sure Dean was still staying with Sonny. It wasn’t uncommon for the boys to get to go home and immediately slip back into failing grades and missed assignments. It was rarely the kid's fault.

“I’m fine. I’m not ruining anything. I swear Sonny. I did it and I turned it in. I’m sorry that they bothered you. I’ll make sure it won’t happen again. They don’t usually call for things like that. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.” The boy was practically shaking and Sonny didn’t want to think about what the kid’s experience with school phone calls was like. All of Dean’s confidence and attitude had slipped away. All that was left was a scared kid.

Sonny took a step forward, intending to comfort the frightened child.

Dean flinched, taking a step back, his face somehow becoming even whiter. Sonny could hear the boy’s breath hitch before he straightened, a resigned fear in his eyes. The older man clenched his jaw as he once, not for the first time in the last several weeks, cursed the absent John Winchester.

Dean wasn’t moving. He seemed to almost be at attention, trying to keep the fear out of his eyes. Sonny took another step forward only for Dean to flinch again, this time not leaving his position, ready to face whatever punishment was dealt him.

Sonny crouched slightly so he was eye level with the sixteen-year-old. The boy’s eyes were everywhere except for on Sonny. “Dean,” he was doing his best to keep his voice firm, but kind, “Dean, look at me.”

The kid’s eyes stayed pointed over Sonny’s left should. The older man gently placed his hands on Dean’s shoulders. The boy’s breath hitched slightly and Sonny could feel the rigidness of his shoulders.

“Son, look at me.”

Moving like it was a great feat, Dean’s green eyes met his own. There was fear mixed with confusion mixed with regret. Sonny’s heart broke for the kid that had made so much progress over the last month.

“Dean I need you to listen to me and understand exactly what I’m saying to you.” Green eyes stayed unmoving on his face. “I’m not going to hit you. I will never hit you. I will never push you. I will never slap you. I will never hurt you in any way. Do you understand me?”

Dean didn’t look relieved, if anything he looked more frightened.

“I’m serious Dean. I will never hurt you, or anyone else who lives here. No one should ever hurt you and as long as you’re with me, no one will.” The boy’s eyes had softened from the fear and left naked hope tinted with confusion. “Do you understand me?”

Dean gave a shaky nod, his eyes bright with unwilling tears. He released a shaky breath with a forced “Yes, sir.”

“Why don’t you go upstairs and cool off for a little while and then we can talk about this later, okay? Go ahead and put your paper in your bag so you don’t forget it tomorrow.” He offered a reassuring smile.

“Okay.” The voice was small and unsure.

The boy turned and wordlessly walked away.

Sonny watched him go, hoping he never got the opportunity to meet John Winchester, knowing that if it ever happened Dean would walk right back into a world where not getting hit was somehow earth-shattering. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sam's tomorrow (or tonight, let's see how patient I am).
> 
> That's all I have planned but if there's someone you'd like to see, just let me know and I'll see what I can do!
> 
> Have a very very Merry Christmas and let me know what you thought!
> 
> God bless,  
> Jamie

**Author's Note:**

> I'll probably post Sonny's chapter next. I meant to post it first, but I just couldn't get it to flow right. After that I'll have a chapter with Sam to finish it off. (Unless of course someone wants to see someone else react to Dean's issues). 
> 
> Come say hi on Tumblr and ask about my view of John Winchester's abuse.
> 
> Anyway, I hope everyone that celebrates will have a very very Merry Christmas and very very happy New Year! 
> 
> Leave a comment and make my Christmas better!
> 
> God bless,  
> Jamie


End file.
